Why?

Over a decade ago I was exchanging Christmas presents with a fellow missionary kid in Rajshahi, Bangladesh. He gave me a beautiful fountain pen. We lost contact until last fall when we started writing each other again. All of a sudden, I stopped hearing from him and got an email from his parents. He had been diagnosed with cancer, Ewing’s sarcoma of his left pelvis. After his diagnosis, he withdrew from college, where he was excelling academically, and moved with his parents to a small apartment in a different state where he had no friends. He has to go almost daily to a cancer center to give blood specimens and undergo others tests, if not to receive infusions of chemotherapy. He has to take medicines throughout the day to prevent treatment side effects, and he has to take his temperature four times a day to monitor for infection. Just below his right collar bone, going into his chest is an intravenous catheter that he has to flush with a heparin solution every night and cover with Press N' Seal for protection every time he bathes. He must conscientiously protect his fragile hip by using a cane to go short distances in his apartment and crutches when he goes out. The hair on his head is completely gone, and his eyebrows and eyelashes are nearly gone. He gets pale from anemia, and his finger nails bear stress-induced ridges chronicling the six cycles of heavy-duty chemotherapy he has received during four months. The doctors wanted to shrink his tumor but have recently informed him that the chemotherapy is not working, and his tumor has grown again. They are planning to surgically remove the residual cancer at a date still unknown.


As childhood friends who grew up in Bangladesh, we have an unusual bond. I ask myself daily, “What can I do?” I have not had the courage to call him or talk to him since I found out. What role do I play in this situation, and why has God burdened me to pray for something so beyond my control and understanding? My dear friend is learning valuable lessons about himself, God, and life, but the price for these lessons is unbearable for me to comprehend. Why, and why can I not understand? There are no easy answers.

Jesus, I Adore Thee (13th Century Chant) arr. Stephen Caracciolo

Jesus, I adore Thee, Word of truth and grace,
Who in glory shineth light upon our race.
Christ, to Thee surrendered, my whole heart is bowed.
Alpha and Omega, thou true Son of God.

Taste and touch and vision to discern Thee, fail;
faith that comes by hearing pierces through the veil.
I believe whate'er the Son of God hath told.
What the truth hath spoken, that for truth I hold.

Word of God incarnate, Lord of life and light,
teach me how to love and worship Thee aright.
Holy Spirit, ever bide within my heart,
speaking Thy commandments, telling all Thou art.

Wondrous revelation, verity and grace.
Lo, in heaven's glory I see Thee face to face.
Light of endless ligh Whom heaven and earth adore,
fill me with Thy radiance, now and evermroe.

(text by St. Thomas Aquinas; translation by Stephen Caracciolo)

Not about the feelings.

My last few updates have been specifically about my "feelings" and life in general so I thought that I'd give you a glimpse of some "concepts" and questions that I wrestle with here in Dallas.

I am learning about the importance of understanding a group's cultural worldview more and more. For example, I just learned about a culture that finds it extremely rude to approach a person's house or even pass by without permission. One has to call out from the path or vicinity of the house with an appropriate greeting and receive a specific response before approaching the house. If the situation is not handled in the right manner it is very offensive... people have even been speared! Well, how would you translate Rev. 3:20, "I stand at the door and knock." or any verse having to do with visiting someone's house?

How does a person who is not from that culture learn these things (before getting speared)?

It is very important to translate something in an understandable and meaningful form, but what liberties can a translator take? Now Rev. 3 above is a figurative example, but what about the verses that are literally about a person entering a home? In translation theory, I learned about the importance of making a text applicable to its readers but also the importance of not changing historical events just because they are culturally inappropriate.

What about color?

People all over the world have different perceptions of color. Some people think that there are only three colors: black, white, and red; and all the colors that we see (blue, pink, brown, orange, etc) are divided amongst these three. I read about a culture that considers the color of something very important, and they define concepts with color. They associate white with pure, masculinity, and birth; and red with danger. The "pale horse" in Revelation 6:8 symbolizes "death." So in this particular culture, it would be more appropriate to use the color red. But then how would you distinguish this horse from the red horse representing "war" in verse 4? And is it okay to change the colors of the horses in the passage from the originals?

These are some questions that have been presented to me in my classes here in Dallas, along with others like... How do you translate the word "God" into a language that has no concept of a personal deity? Or for you grammar geeks... How would you translate a passive clause into a language that doesn't have passive constructions?

All this to say....

I'm learning a lot.

God is a fantastic teacher.

I'm ripping my hair out with my bazillion unanswered questions.

Thank you ALL for your prayers and your partnership with me in this ministry of getting the Bible into the languages and hearts of the people. I am amazed at the responses that I've gotten from this group that I was so hesitant in making. THANK YOU! I would love to here your thoughts, comments, and any updates about your lives.

A moment in my day.

It is 1:34 pm, and I am sitting in an empty classroom. I have a habit of coming to class very early... somewhat obsessive. Discourse Analysis. We just did some charting on "The Tale of the Three Trees." This course is interesting, challenging, and makes me think. It seems like everything in my life has been that way since moving to Dallas a month ago.

Everything is new.

It hasn't been difficult adjusting and fitting into this world of linguistic nerds who love Jesus, but I do feel somewhat alone. I left my family, friends, prayer group, and everything comfortable. I feel like it's easy to be obedient because I love what I'm doing, but giving up the privilege of living with my family and fellowshipping with a very tight-knit group has definitely been a challenge. I'm grateful for this training ground.

Class begins.

It's been a while.

It has been a while since I've updated this thing with the happenings of all aspects of my life. Here is a start.

I am in graduate school now. Weird. This is the fifth move I've made in about nine months, including three different states.

God is good.

I came here in January. My car made it about 2,000 miles on a broken-ish head gasket. Many people said that it would not make it. She's still running.

God is good.

I've finished one course: Scripture Use Methods. It was such a good class, and I have learned so much about the importance of promoting translated Scripture in an applicable and effective way.

God is good.

I've started two more classes: Culture, Language, & Mind and Discourse Analysis. I think that they are going to be good classes. Hard, but good. They make me think, and they challenge me. That's for sure. I have felt pretty insecure about my knowledge, training, and abilities, but...

God is good.

I am definitely being humbled as I sit in classes with brilliant and experienced professors and students. Some things... many things... are way over my head.

God is good.

Satan has been attacking the school physically, spiritually, and emotionally. He doesn't want people to get the Scriptures. Christ has healed many people and relationships.

God is good.

I have been exploding with emotions. A dear childhood friend has cancer and is going in for his seventh round of chemotherapy in the last few month. My heart is heavy. I don't understand the Lord's ways.

God is good.

I miss my family.

God is good.

I have been going to an excellent church that I found right away, and I am being fed. The Lord has also opened up opportunities to spread His love.

God is good.

I am learning that it is okay to be amazed at the Lord's work and His incredible wonders.

GOD IS SO GOOD.

Micah 6:8, "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."

Christ has ONE bride!

Dear ones and conquering prayer warriors! :)

I just had a wonderful conversation with my dear brother. His deep desire for the things of the Lord encourages me. Today he shared with me his desire of seeing the Church united as on body. After all, we are the bride of Christ, right? We prayed together and meditated on the following...

"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom!" --Proverbs

Over the last week, I have had a few conversations with different people about the Lord and the way He works among us, His people. There are so many questions that consume my thoughts and confuse me to no end. The ways of the Lord are truly a mystery. He has graciously and mercifully given us His Word in our language. Getting this Word into other languages is one of my greatest passions and dreams, and I am so grateful that the Lord has allowed me to train for Bible translation and study something I absolutely love!

Today's sermon was on the Divine Glory, Divine Judgment, and Divine Mercy of God. It was such a beautiful reminder for me. Mercy is not deserved. It is a free gift. That's what makes it mercy.Aren't you glad that we have such a merciful and personal God?!

I sure am.

Thank you for your much needed and appreciated prayers as I continue my training here in Dallas. Though I miss my snow (I do!), it is kind of nice to wear shorts and sandals. :)

May the Lord bless you and equip you for His purposes, and may the motivation for everything you do be our Christ---merciful Savior.

Lovingly,Ruthie
(If you want to receive my monthly prayer letter sent out by LBT, email me at rlee@lbt.org.)

Lord, say to my soul, "I am your salvation." (Ps 35:3)

I have been feeling like Anne when she is away from home and longs for her Green Gables. I miss my Minnesota and all that I left, but I'm grateful for the way God is working in my life through the struggles and challenges! I am definitely being tested and broken. It is a very humbling experience to sit in my Scripture Use Methods class surrounded by experienced translators and missionaries who have so much to offer. Who am I? Nobody without my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. God is good, and He says to my soul, "I am your salvation." (Ps. 35:3b)

He is the King of Glory!

------------------PRAISE:------------------
Happy Birthday Jesus!
I had a wonderful time celebrating Christmas with my family and saying goodbye to them for some months. I'm staying with my sister Mary and her family in Ohio before I head down to Dallas on the 4th and 5th.During the roadtrip to Ohio, my sister Esther and I had a good discussion about God and how He graciously reveals Himself to us in so many different ways. The Lord displays His faithfulness to each of us, and we notice it in many different ways. She sees His might and faithfulness most through creation, and I through people.

This is what Yahweh (the LORD) said to Moses while on the mountain, "Yahweh, Yahweh, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin."

Thanks to His son Jesus, whose birth we just celebrated, our sins ARE forgiven. YES!!!

--------------PRAYER:--------------
My car made it fine to Ohio with a broken headgasket; and she's still running, but I still have over 1,000 miles to drive. Please pray for protection on the road for me and for my friend Kevin who's driving down with me.My last post was about lonliness and finding comfort in Christ. This is a lesson I am still learning along with several others. I am still going through a rough patch, but God's faithfulness is magnified during these bumps. I am encouraged by Psalm 24.

TO GOD BE THE GLORY!

1 The earth is the LORD's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it;
2 for he founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters.
3 Who may ascend the hill of the LORD? Who may stand in his holy place?
4 He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to an idol or swear by what is false.
5 He will receive blessing from the LORD and vindication from God his Savior.
6 Such is the generation of those who seek him, who seek your face, O God of Jacob.(Selah)
7 Lift up your heads, O you gates; be lifted up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in.
8 Who is this King of glory? The LORD strong and mighty, the LORD mighty in battle.
9 Lift up your heads, O you gates; lift them up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in.
10 Who is he, this King of glory? The LORD Almighty— he is the King of glory. (Selah)

Home again!

Last week, I was sitting on my bed thinking about what I should say at the church I was visiting the next morning. I have been speaking every Sunday for about a month about my role with LBT and LBT's role in Bible translation work, but what I say is modified every week as I think about what the Lord might have for me to say. As I listened, this song came to me..."Teach me, Lord, to have faith in what you're bringing me will change my life and bring you glory! There on the storm, I am learning to let go of the will that I so long to control. There may I be in your arms eternally. I thank you, Lord; you are the calmer of the storm."This is the chorus for Downhere's song, "Calmer of the Storm". What an encouragement! It is so comforting to know that no matter what we go through the Lord is with us...always!I'M HOME AGAIN (for a couple months)! Many of you have been praying for me and the family I was nannying for (See previous updates). Jen has made unbelievable progress, and she is almost completely off the IVs!!! Praise the Lord. I am desperately going to miss the four little boys I have come to love so dearly, and my dear kindred spirit who has been a mentor and friend, Jen. But... what a blessing it is to be home early! Now I can spend much needed time with LBT paperwork, reports, and my Hermeneutics directed study.

Tiny faith, gi-normous grace!

Well, the Lord has been teaching me quite a bit about my weaknesses and some of the many things that I have yet to learn.I have had bronchitis for about a week, so between coughing fits and exhaustion, I have been doing quite a bit of thinking. Many of you know the dream I have of going overseas to meet an exciting group of people, to learn an exciting language, and to tell people about OUR Savior. Well, this excitement is still there, but reality is beginning to kick in as time continues to tick. As I've been meeting pastors and speaking to groups, I am learning more about this call than I had before. I am ashamed to admit that doubt and feelings of fear have crept up over the last couple weeks. I am beginning to embrace this time the Lord has given me for training. The unknown of Nigeria is beginning to challenge my courage with thoughts of..."How long will it take to communicate with people?" "Will the language be difficult?""Will I be lonely?" "Will I make a friend to spill my concerns to?" "Will the Lord supply ALL my needs?" "Will I have the courage to talk about my Lord?""Will people listen?""Will the job seem monotonous?""Will there be fruit?""Will God be glorified?"My faith is tiny, and God's grace is gi-normous!"Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for you brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart. For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. For 'All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever." -I Peter 1:22-24

Only 429!!!

First! How can I pray for you? Please update me.Thank you, thank you, thank you! The encouragement I have received is incredible, and I am especially thankful for those who have offered to help me with the family I'm caring for (see past posts). We need it. I am so grateful for all of you who are praying for me, and I am so excited that I have a chance to share my heart with you.Recently as I have be reading the Word and feeling its overwhelming power, I have been thinking about those who don't have it (surprise, surprise). Do you know that there are 6,912 languages in the world, and only 429 languages have complete Bibles? That's about 6%. Does this shock you or what? I've been learning about translation for 3-4 years now and this fact feels like a boulder being thrown on me. What can I do? Pray.Only 429! http://www.wycliffe.org/About/Statistics.aspxA little over 1,000 languages have only the New Testament, and nearly 2,000 translations are in progress. Why is it that only 429 languages have the Bible translated, and we have over 50 complete modern English translations? Huh?!I am praising the Lord for these 429 complete translations (though many are already outdated because of language changes). BUT!!! I am grieved that there are so few in comparison to the thousands left. Whew! I have also been burdened with the need for Old Testament translations. It's the majority of Scripture, its translation need is downplayed, and the need is enormous! Please pray.Please pray for...-The 196 MILLION people who don't have ANY Scripture at all. NONE!-The incredibly overwhelming translation needs.-Continual guidance with what project I am to work with in Nigeria. There are over 500 languages there and 135 million people!-Opportunities for me to speak in churches. Scheduling has been difficult.-The family I'm living with and caring for, my health, and wisdom with care and discipline.-My focus on the Lord. It's hard.****I just sent out my first prayer letter with LBT so if you didn't receive it and would like to please contact me at rlee@lbt.org(If you do not want to receive updates feel free to leave the group.)

Nanny time!

There are some big changes!As most of you know, I have been living with my parent for the past year which has been an incredible blessing. This may change very soon. A married couple, Micah and Jennifer are very dear friends of mine who I've known for many years, and they have come to a very challenging point in their life. I feel like the Lord has blessed me with the opportunity to help. I grew up with Micah in Bangladesh and I consider his family as my own... our families are extremely close.The situation:They live about an hour north of where I live now. Micah and Jennifer are expecting their 5th child. Pregnancies have always been tough for Jen and this one is the worst so far. She has a blood condition which causes the baby's blood to clot. For that reason she must be on a blood thinner. This time that treatment caused internal bleeding within the uterus so had to be discontinued. This places a higher risk on the baby. Jen is feeling absolutely terrible physically. She is unable to eat or drink properly, and the 4 boys they already have are a handful. She normally homeschools, and Micah works full time. Their world has turned inside out, and they are desperately in need of help and prayer.PLEASE PRAY!Despite my assignment to do partnership development (prayer and financial support raising for my upcoming ministry overseas) this fall from LBT, I have been given permission to ALSO help Micah and Jen. The situation is still being discussed, but I may live with them until December while I am doing traveling and speaking on weekends throughout Minnesota (Micah works full time during the week). This will make my schedule completely full, but I trust the Lord's provision. I don't know what all they need, but with 4 little redheaded boys, hospital runs, cooking, cleaning, possibly homeschooling/school runs, I'm sure I'll keep my weekdays full. On top of this, I have to speak on weekends and hopefully some weekdays at churches about LBT and Bible translation.AGAIN, Please pray for Micah and Jen, the baby, the boys, me, and this situation. Please email me at ruthlee86@gmail.com if you have any questions or comments. The Lord's blessings on you.

The Weekend

I only have 4 hours of weekend left! What happened? I feel like I'm always desperately trying to find more time in my day, but this weekend was fabulous. I went to Bemidji to visit a couple friends last night and drove back today after a relaxing afternoon at a coffee shop.

The Lord blessed me this weekend with Exodus 33: Moses and the Glory of God. This is a conversation that Moses and the LORD had just after He commanded Moses and the Israelites to leave Sinai.

Moses: See, you say to me, "Bring up this people," but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. Yet you have said, "I know you by name, and you have also found favor in my sight." Now therefore, if I have found favor in your sight, please show me now your ways, that I may know you in order to find favor in your sight. Consider too that this nation is your people.

YHWH: My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.

Moses: If you presence will not go with me, do not bring us up from here. For how shall it be known that I have found favor in your sight, I and your people? Is it not in your going with us, so that we are distinct, I and your people from every other people on the face of the earth?

YHWH: This very thing that you have spoken I will do, for you have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name.

Moses: Please show me your glory.

YHWH: I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name "YHWH." And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy. But, you cannot see my face, for man shall not see me and live. Behold, there is a place by me where you shall stand on the rock, and while my glory passes by I will put you in a cleft of the rock, and I will cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will take away my hand, and you shall see my back, but my face shall not be seen.

Wow! So Moses struggled with doubt and uncertainty to, huh? "Who will you send with me?" is Moses' question and the LORD's answer is "My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." Wow wow wow wow wow! This seems to be a 'why are you doubting me? take heart!' kind of statement. I needed this reminder and the LORD is gracious for giving it to me. Praise HIM! To God be the glory!