Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Provision
I just had a wonderful visit with Mary, Lily, and Grandma&pa. What a wonderful blessing it is to have those occasional family times. So full of love! I'm a week into school now. I'm enjoying it and finding that I don't have to grumble about not having a summer. :) I am being challenged outside of academics, with my car breaking down 3 times in the past 2 weeks, and many other things. I'm learning that it's okay to depend on those that the Lord has placed above you. Extremely humbling, yes, but I'm so grateful for the lessons I'm learning. Serves me right asking God for a challenge, huh? I'm also praising God for a full week work schedule. I was pleasantly surprised that they scheduled me everyday I asked for (over 20 hours). The Lord is so good and I don't know why I doubt, and why I'm surprised at his never-ending provision ... in his timing that is! But, always on time!
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Congratulations Christy!
Well, I've moved. My house is pretty cute. It's 5 bedrooms, but we're going to need it with 7 GIRLS! Insanity? Yes, I believe so. I'm not completely unpacked, but settled enough to get by. I start school tomorrow. Eek. I don't know where any of my classes are and I think that's a bit of a problem. I'm taking English, Math, Anthropology, Fitness, Music Appreciation, and Western Civ. 18 Credit. Why do I do this? Oh well. I'm looking forward to getting into some kind of routine though. I'm working at Baker's Square and trying to trust the Lord with the hours that I'm getting. He will provide and I'm learning that I can't be in control of my income and such things. I'm having fun seeing old friends and catching up on all the summer news. My dear friend of 11 years is engaged! Congratulations Christy Nelson!!! It's going to give me a good excuse to go home to be in the wedding ... still deciding a date. Josh is surely a lucky man to be getting one of my dearest friends. Well, all is well ... overall it is, but there are many little stresses that need prayer. Praise the Lord though, right? For all the stretching and molding.
Sunday, August 14, 2005
Discipline
I just finished reading a book by Elisabeth Elliot called "Discipline: The Glad Surrender". I got the book as a gift from my dear friend Rhoda and it has been the perfect relief from all the stress that's been built up this summer. I've taken the last couple of days and just read. The chapters addressed so many of the issues that I'm struggling with. The first couple chapters are on God's call and my answer. It brings up many disciplines:
Body- I'm realizing that I'm taking for granted so many blessings that the Lord is giving me. Recently I've had sort of a built up fear of health and the uncertainty of it. My knees and ankles are giving me problems and some other health issues ... Then the Lord reminds me of his control on my life and my dependence on him for every breath. Praise God for that! He reminds me how fortunate I am. Even though I possibly might not be able to do the rugged bush traveling that I want to do in the jungles of no where (or something like that) he still commmand me to glorify him. Whatever I do. I think of Joni Eareckson who is paralyzed and paints with the brush in her mouth.
Mind- "The Christ-like mind counts for nothing what the world holds dear and holds as all-important what the world counts for nothing." (Elisabeth Elliot) Wisdom is pure; and then peace-loving, considerate, and open to reason; it is straightforward and sincere, rich in mercy and in the kindly deeds that are its fruits. I pray the Lord gives me a mind like a child. Innocent and curious, and PURE.
Place- I am so grateful to my parents for teaching me respect and place. I just have to put it into practice. As a kid, everyone was either Mr/Mrs or Aunt/Uncle. Growing up, I'm learning that people address each other by first names. It is very awkward for me. If I am placed under my elders and must submit to them, should I not address them with honor and respect? I'm still learning. Elisabeth Elliot writes of how honor is not necessarily a feeling, but a command. Give honor where honor is due. Due... "owed, payable". "It is not something above and beyond the call of duty, but something obligatory, just like bills, tolls, or taxes. It means also as much as is required, as 'due care,' or 'in due time.'" Reverence, respect, honor...
Time- "Oh, Lord, this is a continual surrender." I have to remember that everything is not about accomplishing something. It's a learning process, and discipline lesson. The Lord may decide to put me through something for years even when nothing comes of it, but a lesson learned. I mustn't do something expecting a result, but do something for God's glory. Yes, I can have goals, but I have to let the Lord direct every step.
Possessions- I read this chapter just in time to praise God for my bad alternator! I was pleasantlly surprised at what praise does. Instead of crying over my car... (I still might) I am finding that the Lord continually provides and will do so always. He supplies my needs. I was supposed to move into my house tomorrow and my landlord is going to help me move my stuff with his truck which will save time and gas money. I pray that my car will continue to run and provide transportation to and from work and school, but if it doesn't God be praised. He give and takes away. Everything He gives must be lifted back to Him in praise!
Work- I've addressed this before and I am ashamed to admit that it is hard to walk into work and think only "Lord, how might you be glorified?" and not about paying the bills. It's a battle, but there is victory with Christ and his continual much needed grace and mercy.
Feelings- I'm learning, like everything else. I'm a pretty emotional person, but God made me this way and I have to remember that everything I feel must come under His control and be in obedience to Him. Help!
I am sharing this, not so that everyone can see every detail of my life, but so that maybe if you read one thing that might encourage you, my job is done. :) It's taking me a long time to learn a lot of these lessons and I'm far from done, but I am so grateful for everything that the Lord is teaching me right now. I pray that you might learn from my mistakes, so why should I hide them?
Body- I'm realizing that I'm taking for granted so many blessings that the Lord is giving me. Recently I've had sort of a built up fear of health and the uncertainty of it. My knees and ankles are giving me problems and some other health issues ... Then the Lord reminds me of his control on my life and my dependence on him for every breath. Praise God for that! He reminds me how fortunate I am. Even though I possibly might not be able to do the rugged bush traveling that I want to do in the jungles of no where (or something like that) he still commmand me to glorify him. Whatever I do. I think of Joni Eareckson who is paralyzed and paints with the brush in her mouth.
Mind- "The Christ-like mind counts for nothing what the world holds dear and holds as all-important what the world counts for nothing." (Elisabeth Elliot) Wisdom is pure; and then peace-loving, considerate, and open to reason; it is straightforward and sincere, rich in mercy and in the kindly deeds that are its fruits. I pray the Lord gives me a mind like a child. Innocent and curious, and PURE.
Place- I am so grateful to my parents for teaching me respect and place. I just have to put it into practice. As a kid, everyone was either Mr/Mrs or Aunt/Uncle. Growing up, I'm learning that people address each other by first names. It is very awkward for me. If I am placed under my elders and must submit to them, should I not address them with honor and respect? I'm still learning. Elisabeth Elliot writes of how honor is not necessarily a feeling, but a command. Give honor where honor is due. Due... "owed, payable". "It is not something above and beyond the call of duty, but something obligatory, just like bills, tolls, or taxes. It means also as much as is required, as 'due care,' or 'in due time.'" Reverence, respect, honor...
Time- "Oh, Lord, this is a continual surrender." I have to remember that everything is not about accomplishing something. It's a learning process, and discipline lesson. The Lord may decide to put me through something for years even when nothing comes of it, but a lesson learned. I mustn't do something expecting a result, but do something for God's glory. Yes, I can have goals, but I have to let the Lord direct every step.
Possessions- I read this chapter just in time to praise God for my bad alternator! I was pleasantlly surprised at what praise does. Instead of crying over my car... (I still might) I am finding that the Lord continually provides and will do so always. He supplies my needs. I was supposed to move into my house tomorrow and my landlord is going to help me move my stuff with his truck which will save time and gas money. I pray that my car will continue to run and provide transportation to and from work and school, but if it doesn't God be praised. He give and takes away. Everything He gives must be lifted back to Him in praise!
Work- I've addressed this before and I am ashamed to admit that it is hard to walk into work and think only "Lord, how might you be glorified?" and not about paying the bills. It's a battle, but there is victory with Christ and his continual much needed grace and mercy.
Feelings- I'm learning, like everything else. I'm a pretty emotional person, but God made me this way and I have to remember that everything I feel must come under His control and be in obedience to Him. Help!
I am sharing this, not so that everyone can see every detail of my life, but so that maybe if you read one thing that might encourage you, my job is done. :) It's taking me a long time to learn a lot of these lessons and I'm far from done, but I am so grateful for everything that the Lord is teaching me right now. I pray that you might learn from my mistakes, so why should I hide them?
Saturday, August 13, 2005
the terms of christian surrender: unconditional and lifetime
"I have been before God, and have given myself, all that I am and have, to God; so that I am not, in any respect, my own ... I have given myself clear away, and have not retained any thing as my own." -Jonathan Edwards
"There can be no peace until you are willing to accept My (God's) terms-unconditional surrender ... One who demands and deserves our wholehearted allegiance ... Through an internal work of the Spirit and the grace of God, our willful, rebellious hearts were conquered and we were each given a new heart-a heart to love God and to obey and follow Christ as our Captain and sovereign Lord ... Christian surrender means that we come to Him on His terms ... The terms of our surrender to the Lord Jesus are non-negotiable and unconditional ... 'I surrender all' ... Christian surrender brings us what we now see is beauty, life, joy, and true good ... I had little comprehension of the implications of full surrender. I had no idea what God would ask of me down the road. What I did know was that Jesus is Lord, that my life belonged to Him, and that to surrender myself completely to One who possessed infinite wisdom, love, and power was the only course that made any sense. With all my heart, I knew that I wanted to follow Christ-whatever that might mean, whatever it might require, and wherever it might lead me ... 'Here's a blank piece of paper. I want you to sign your name on the bottom line, hand it back to Me, and let Me fill in the details. Why? Because I am God; because I have bought you; because I am trustworthy; because you know how much I love you; because you live for My glory and not you own independent, self-promoting pleasure.'"
"There can be no peace until you are willing to accept My (God's) terms-unconditional surrender ... One who demands and deserves our wholehearted allegiance ... Through an internal work of the Spirit and the grace of God, our willful, rebellious hearts were conquered and we were each given a new heart-a heart to love God and to obey and follow Christ as our Captain and sovereign Lord ... Christian surrender means that we come to Him on His terms ... The terms of our surrender to the Lord Jesus are non-negotiable and unconditional ... 'I surrender all' ... Christian surrender brings us what we now see is beauty, life, joy, and true good ... I had little comprehension of the implications of full surrender. I had no idea what God would ask of me down the road. What I did know was that Jesus is Lord, that my life belonged to Him, and that to surrender myself completely to One who possessed infinite wisdom, love, and power was the only course that made any sense. With all my heart, I knew that I wanted to follow Christ-whatever that might mean, whatever it might require, and wherever it might lead me ... 'Here's a blank piece of paper. I want you to sign your name on the bottom line, hand it back to Me, and let Me fill in the details. Why? Because I am God; because I have bought you; because I am trustworthy; because you know how much I love you; because you live for My glory and not you own independent, self-promoting pleasure.'"
[-Nancy Leigh DeMoss "Surrender: The Heart God Controls"]
I am no longer my own, but thine.
Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt.
Put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me be employed by thee or laid aside for thee,
Exalted for thee or brought low by thee.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God,
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
Thou art mine, and I am thine. So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth,
Let it be ratified in heaven. Amen.
--John Wesley
I am no longer my own, but thine.
Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt.
Put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me be employed by thee or laid aside for thee,
Exalted for thee or brought low by thee.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God,
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
Thou art mine, and I am thine. So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth,
Let it be ratified in heaven. Amen.
--John Wesley
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Happy Birthday!
for all you are and have been.
You are so special to me and
I love you so much.
You are not only my mommy,
but my best friend.
I value your advice and
counsel so much and I
admire your love and
devotion to the Lord.
I hope you know how much
I appreciate you.
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Quicky
My apologies for the over due update. This one also must be brief unfortunately. Just some emergency prayer requests and praises ...
*I made it safely back to the cities and am staying with Kathie
*I got my luggage that was left in Grand Forks
*Great summer!!! Details to come ...
*First day on the job today went well at Baker's Square
*The ministry there, I can see is already opening when my supervisor said she had a lot of questions to ask me about the Bible. I can hardly believe it! Day #1 and the Lord is already blowing me away. Praise God!
*My move on the 15th that everything goes smoothly
*School starts on the 24th
*Continual surrender
Some special emergency prayer requests ...
*My dear friend from bible school, Jeremy Crowell, called me the night before last. He told me that his dad, Pastor Michael Crowell, was killed in a plane crash on the landing in Oshkosh, WI. He was alone in a home-made airplane from his home in Arlington, WA. He was the head of the mission organization MATA that teams up with JAARS and others to do mission aviation. Possibly someday flying me somewhere! Jeremy is praising God with his mom and 15 year old brother and 22 year old sister and husband. Please keep the family in your prayers as they grieve this loss and look forward to the blessing the Lord is abundantly pouring out on them. Jeremy is still with MATA.
*I made it safely back to the cities and am staying with Kathie
*I got my luggage that was left in Grand Forks
*Great summer!!! Details to come ...
*First day on the job today went well at Baker's Square
*The ministry there, I can see is already opening when my supervisor said she had a lot of questions to ask me about the Bible. I can hardly believe it! Day #1 and the Lord is already blowing me away. Praise God!
*My move on the 15th that everything goes smoothly
*School starts on the 24th
*Continual surrender
Some special emergency prayer requests ...
*My dear friend from bible school, Jeremy Crowell, called me the night before last. He told me that his dad, Pastor Michael Crowell, was killed in a plane crash on the landing in Oshkosh, WI. He was alone in a home-made airplane from his home in Arlington, WA. He was the head of the mission organization MATA that teams up with JAARS and others to do mission aviation. Possibly someday flying me somewhere! Jeremy is praising God with his mom and 15 year old brother and 22 year old sister and husband. Please keep the family in your prayers as they grieve this loss and look forward to the blessing the Lord is abundantly pouring out on them. Jeremy is still with MATA.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Praise the LORD!
This is a email that I got from Vanna just the other day. Please continue to keep her in your prayers. I also got one after this and she's meeting with Christina for bible studies and prayer. The Lord truly works miracles doesn't he?!
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Hi Ruthie!
Thanks for the prayer when I called. I really needed it. But God used my bad health amazingly!! I went to the emergency room, I was in pain, and they didn't really do anything to help me. I felt really rotten afterwards and was just having a bad day. So I wanted to get out of the house to get my mind off of my rotten day. So I asked Christina (a foster-child staying with us for a week, she's twelve) to go to a movie with me. I just wanted company so that I didn't have to go to the movies alone. But God had plan for that night. Christina threw a barrage of spiritual questions at me before and after the movie. I could tell that the Holy Spirit had been working on her. And we started going through verses and she came to Christ! She was the first person that I had the privilege to lead to the Lord. He is so good, He saved another soul! Since then, I bought Christina a Bible, she's been reading, and I saw a 180 degree change in that girl in the span of one week. I had been grumbling the entire day before Christina came to Christ. JESUS IS SO AMAZING!
I thought that would be encouraging for you. I hope your studies are going well, I'm praying for you Ruthie! Please continue to pray for me, my health is not getting any better, I have little energy, and I have to take narcotic pain relievers at night so that I can sleep. The chest pain gets so bad that I gag. I spend a lot of time in bed. But since God is not granting me wellness at this time, He must have a plan to use this in some way. I've already seen what God can reap from what I am going through right now. Please pray that I'll have a soft heart and open ears to hear and see what God has planned for me through this. I also have a couple of unpleasant medical tests scheduled, please pray for those as well. You're an amazing friend in Christ Ruthie. I know that we don't talk much, but I know that you are praying for me.
In His Love,
Vanna
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Hi Ruthie!
Thanks for the prayer when I called. I really needed it. But God used my bad health amazingly!! I went to the emergency room, I was in pain, and they didn't really do anything to help me. I felt really rotten afterwards and was just having a bad day. So I wanted to get out of the house to get my mind off of my rotten day. So I asked Christina (a foster-child staying with us for a week, she's twelve) to go to a movie with me. I just wanted company so that I didn't have to go to the movies alone. But God had plan for that night. Christina threw a barrage of spiritual questions at me before and after the movie. I could tell that the Holy Spirit had been working on her. And we started going through verses and she came to Christ! She was the first person that I had the privilege to lead to the Lord. He is so good, He saved another soul! Since then, I bought Christina a Bible, she's been reading, and I saw a 180 degree change in that girl in the span of one week. I had been grumbling the entire day before Christina came to Christ. JESUS IS SO AMAZING!
I thought that would be encouraging for you. I hope your studies are going well, I'm praying for you Ruthie! Please continue to pray for me, my health is not getting any better, I have little energy, and I have to take narcotic pain relievers at night so that I can sleep. The chest pain gets so bad that I gag. I spend a lot of time in bed. But since God is not granting me wellness at this time, He must have a plan to use this in some way. I've already seen what God can reap from what I am going through right now. Please pray that I'll have a soft heart and open ears to hear and see what God has planned for me through this. I also have a couple of unpleasant medical tests scheduled, please pray for those as well. You're an amazing friend in Christ Ruthie. I know that we don't talk much, but I know that you are praying for me.
In His Love,
Vanna
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